Commanded by Skunk - Exploring different forms of humiliation

 Around this time would've been the year anniversary of when I reached out to Devious Skunk to start my career in producing enf content. This comes with the release of Spy vs the Commander - Skunk's Uniform Stolen! This was actually the first video we shot before we shot The Men in Black versus the Kinky Clownians. The idea of this story stemmed from my love of the exposure trope of a character's clothes being stolen and used for a disguise. This is often shown in a lot of action-type movies, sometimes not even showing the actual removal of one's clothes, instead one shot will portray the protagonist and the other character,  with the following scene to show the protagonist wearing the character's clothes. Sometimes we would get to see the character stripped of their clothes and tied up, a double whammy of humiliation. G.I. Joe often used this trope both in the comics and the TV show.

 

 

I also highlighted this trope in a fanfiction story featuring Black Widow in Black Widow's Bad Luck. In this story Black Widow sneaks around, stripping guards of their clothes before she gets caught and is stripped herself. It's one of my earliest stories and one of my most popular ones.

 Thus, that was the idea I had when I created Commander Skunk. I liked the idea of a dominant boss who demeans her soldiers only to be stripped and humiliated as she's tied up in her panties and later, no clothes at all. Still, I didn't feel this was quite enough, I wanted to do something else to make this ENF clip more than just a clothed/unclothed story.

As I have said before, erotic embarrassment and exposure is not just about the nudity/panty exposure, it's about exposing someone's secrets. Most folks have no problems with being seen naked or in their underwear, but it's when there's a detail they don't want people to know about that makes it embarrassing. I thought it would be fun to be in a situation where in being stripped and tied up, that The Commander had a sexual fantasy of this but didn't want anyone to know. This led to the funny premise of her bossing the Spy, to do what she wants him to do to her. We both enjoyed this idea because of how silly it was because in turning the tables, the Spy is now stuck at the mercy of the Commander before she's horribly embarrassed when her men see her caught in the passion of her submissive fantasy.

 

 I thought this would be a simple clip to shoot in terms of the set up and boy was I wrong. Do you know how hard it is to strip someone with a camera strapped to your chest and make sure you have it pointed on the actor? Suuuuuuuupeeeer hard. Once we started filming I realized that I couldn't just focus on removing her catsuit, but I also had to make sure the camera was steady and aimed where I wanted it to. I had to summon all of my lessons from yoga by being very mindful of my body movements so that I moved slowly and not shake the camera. Adding to the challenge was that the catsuit was a lot tighter than I realized, it wasn't something I could simply just pull off.  

These technical issues initially had me concerned because I wasn't sure if the camera would be so shaky it would impact the clip. It was one of the first time I thought about booking a re-shoot, which I now understand the purpose. Thankfully my fears were unfounded as I have watched the clip several times and l love the diverse types of stripping scenarios that Spy vs the Commander has, capturing my love of exposed nerdy and sexy underwear and naked exposure. As always, Skunk's playful and silly energy made this shoot a fun hangout than work. I'm impressed with her ability to write her own cue cards while tied up. We hope you enjoy the clip!

Forget The MCU or DCU, let's make the ECU (Embarrassed Cinematic Universe)

I hope folks had fun celebrating National Erotic Humiliation Day, I have recently released a very personal essay in which I process the painful emotions behind my own embarrassment and shame. It's not exactly a sexy piece, but I felt it honored the spirit of celebrating that people who enjoy this kink have an emotional connection to the fetish as well.

This month's release is the Embarrassed Naked Supervillain, staring Riley Jane. This was the second film I shot with Riley the same day I shot Embarrassed Naked Goth. It was my first time shooting two in one scheduled block of time and I wasn't sure how I would do with getting the shots I needed while sticking to time. Thankfully, Riley was game for it and brought the same fun energy to this story as she did with playing the Dark Empress. As a professional Domme, it was fun to write a character with a dominating personality and see how Riley made her own acting choices to make the character come to life. I wanted her character, The Mad Mask, to be a dominant figure who talked down on her henchmen, mocking them when they are stripped of their underwear before mocking their nakedness. I don't have a small penis humiliation fetish but it was nice to incorporate that kink into the story before Mad Mask gets stripped to her embarrassing underwear.

 

 

 

You may recognize a character mentioned off camera, The Mistress, who I introduced in a story called The Suit, in the Immodest Collection vol 2. This could have been a straight forward ENF clip in that it would have been simple to splice up the shots together for the final cut. I certainly felt too busy and tired at the end of a work week to shoot extra shots. However, in the spirit of a superhero movie, specifically the Batman movies, I felt an added touch would be showing close-up shots of "The Mistress" preparing to fight crime. If you remember the comical way Batman and Robin get suited up in Batman Forever, this is the idea I had when I did some shots of my character. 

 

I didn't have a suit or an actor to play the character, but I knew I could still add dramatic effect with some quick close-up shots of me-er-em the Mistress, putting on a suit just before the actual clip starts. It might not be the reason people buy the clip, but it's a minor detail that adds excitement for me when I watch it through because I wanted to give viewers a visual of who would be behind stripping the Mad Mask. 

 Shooting this scene involved less technical effects than Embarrassed Naked Goth. Both films involve a jump cut between a clothed and less clothed Riley. With the goth storyline, it took more time because we tried our best to match one cut to look like the next to make the time switch seamless. Finding the right smoke and fire effect for the demon magic also took additional time in editing. With Embarrassed Naked Supervillain, it took less time because the lights going on and off took less time to edit. Also, Riley was free to act however she wanted to being stripped in the dark before the lights went on. She used this to her advantage as she came up with some great sound effect ideas to make it clear she was being stripped. I had a great time working with her and it made four hours of shooting fly by because we both had so much fun collaborating ideas. I look forward to shooting with her again and hope you enjoy this latest video.

 You can read more stories featuring the Mistress in A Submissive Superhero Gets Stripped and The Immodest Collection vol 4.

The Bigger & Barer sale and my newest ENF video Haunted House of Humiliation

It's hard to believe summer is over. Before it ends I have lots of exciting things in store for this month and for sENFtember. As you all know, The Immodest Collection volume 4 will be released on 9/1, the first day of sENFtember. The book will feature the return of Erica Hardy and Caitlin McNally from The Immodest Collection volume 1 , The Mistress and Riot from the Immodest Collection volume 2, and Rana Halaweh from Indecent Exposure Therapy To give folks who have not read these books a chance to catch up, for the whole month of August, I am running the Bigger and Barer sale! From now until 8/31/24, you can get the Immodest Collections volumes 1 and 2 AND Indecent Exposure Therapy each for 50% off! That's $1.50 for each story. So, with the final month of summer, use that time to catch up on some spicy exposed and embarrassed erotica and turn up the heat even more! Each book can be purchased on Smashwords . I hope everyone who has not read these books gets a chance to cash in on more enf/euf erotica! In addition, I will be releasing a free story featuring Riot and The Mistress that takes place between the Immodest Collection volume 2 and 4 on my Medium page

Because of these writing projects, I took a month off from filming. So when I resumed again, I was ready to get back into the swing of things with filming and took a step into another area of growth for me, and that was shooting two ENF films back to back.

I previously hesitated into doing two in a row because I did not know the length of time it would take to shoot one clip. I wanted to give myself time to mentally process directing, adjusting lights, and filming and the first 5 films took roughly about 4 hours each. However to be more cost effective, I know a lot of professionals shoot multiple clips within that 4 hour time frame. This makes sense in terms of being cost effective, especially when it comes to booking a shoot space.

So once I found a location I was excited to work with Violet Vixen and Devious Skunk again. My long term goal is to work with a wide range of models but since I'm still new and I have such good fun shooting with both Violet and Skunk, I knew it would be a fun process.

The concept I wanted to do was a relatively simple ENF storyline in terms of setting up ENF gags and a common plot that I see is a real estate agent visiting a house story. The idea is always a model going into rooms with their clothes disappearing. It seems like a basic idea but that was where the fun came in writing the characters. With Violet I envisioned her being a Type A, bossy real estate agent obsessed with a perfect record so that when she is exposed, it makes the contrast nice in terms of focusing on her humiliation. 

 

 

The challenges to this shoot. Which I am still trying to figure out is making seamless cuts between pre and post stripping. For ease of shooting, I break things in chunks so that dialogue is easier to act out and memorize. I also think this makes for stronger performances as there is mental effort put into wondering what the next line is. 

Of course, a seamless cut makes for a smoother transition but here in lies one of the challenges to directing. I could do take after take hoping that the model will eventually get a long page of dialogue down in one take without any slip ups. However, there are other things to keep in mind and that's the models physical and mental well being. It was HOT that day, at least into 90 degree range and to keep sound off I had to switch between turning air conditioners on and off for sound. Violet and Skunk each had to wear business attire and so the risk of doing take after take could have been exhaustion or worse dehydrating them to the point of passing out which I did not want. So making sure water was in supply and also doing as much as I can to minimize wait time wad this shoots lesson, which meant stopping longer to review my shots and make sure I got what I needed before moving forward. 

 

I also have learned more about writing in that I need to trim up and be concise with dialogue. When I write scripts I'm used to pouring the dialogue out as it flows through my imagination, cutting up bits I don't feel are needed later. Much of the extra dialogue is what I think is embarrassing for the character but not exactly what the model will think when they make acting choices. It also adds unnecessary time to shooting because the model wants to do their best to get the lines right and it can be easier on them if I cut out the excess that isn't important. 

I also learned a lot about my own stamina for shooting as it was essentially a full work day. While I was tired by the end, it was satisfying to walk away with two full clips that have been fun editing. Violet stars in Haunted House of Humiliation, in which a real estate agent finds out why anyone who buys the home abandons it out of fear of being stripped naked and spanked. It is available now on my MV page. Skunks film will be not so much a part two and more of a sequel to this story which I will reveal likely at the start of October for the scary season.

As always I appreciate the support from you all and hope you enjoy the latest ENF film!

Starstruck experiences shooting my second ENF video Embarrassment is Forever!

 Well folks, ENF video number two is in the...digital folder (I guess we don't use film cans anymore). If you follow my newsletter then it is not a surprise to you that this past week I worked with the amazingly talented BDSM model and author Ariel Anderssen. Ariel has been in the adult industry for 20 years, coming from a strict religious upbringing that she has since talked about in her autobiography Playing to Lose. Much of her content focuses on themes related to bondage and spanking videos. Her catalog is huge so it's worth it to check out her website. Where we crossed paths was of course, ENF. She has shot quite a few ENF videos, one of which I reviewed in this month's newsletter. I would consider her one of the top ENF performers in the industry and that definitely showed when we met up to film Embarrassment is Forever, a parody on the James Bond Films.

 

 

 

I think I first saw Ariel's work maybe in 2017 or earlier. I never in a million year would have believed to ever be in the room directing her in my own video. I was so appreciative of her willingness to work with someone new to the industry and make my silly idea come to life. This was my first time shooting in a different location where I did not have weeks to prepare my shots in advance. I was also coming from work and so in general, I was coming into this shoot a bit more stressed and nervous than I already was feeling working with a well-known professional in the industry. Case in point, I almost had a panic moment when my camera microphone wasn't working, only to realize I plugged it into the headphone 

jack.

 

 

My nervousness did not last because Ariel was so pleasant and kind to work with.The hours flew by because in between shooting takes, we had a lovely time chatting about various topics, one thing we both enjoyed was talking about the industry and the psychology of kinks and why people enjoy various ones. Naturally, that is a topic I could talk endlessly about. I think that helped build a positive energy while we shot and also helped me feel calm and composed, making sure I could take my time with shooting so as not to feel rushed.

 

Watching Ariel's performances in ENF is a great experience. As I've discussed previously, it is easy to see performers who are comfortable with acting in an exposed and embarrassed story and those who seem less comfortable. This is especially the case when acting in a solo video where they have very little, if any, dialogue to react to. Often times it is on the performer to find ways to act throughout the whole clip, finding a pace that isn't rushed but also stay present in character to make a funny/sexy exposed and embarrassed story. Ariel demonstrates this excellently. You can pick any of her videos and know that she will deliver a stunning performance because she is fully in character and improvises for a long stretch of time. This is a skill that not many folks have and so when she was game to work with me, I had the exact script in mind, literally able to hear her voice speak lines as I was writing it.

 

Seeing Ariel perform in person is a whole other experience that I cannot put into words. Because I was so focused on getting the shot and also giving her direction to help explain what I was looking for, I didn't get to appreciate until editing just how good of an actor she is. It is so hard editing because I love all of the takes we did and it makes it very hard to choose one. I was floored at her ability to deliver two long takes without any hesitation or need to stop to be fed a line, she did it seamlessly. Although I had a script, I don't require actors to memorize anything because I want to give them as much flexibility to speak. Sometimes, I think this might may make folks feel uncertain of where to take the scene but Ariel did so well, adding ideas/dialogue that told a fun, hilarious exposed and embarrassed story. My training in acting is a few classes in high school and then 11 years of standup comedy, so you can probably tell from my poor attempt at a British accent that acting is not in my future. However, when I would say a line or make a gesture in response to what Ariel acted, she would use that to make the scene work. While I enjoyed working with Devious Skunk and coaching her through what ENF is and how to act, it was so fucking cool to watch a professional like Ariel act without really any need from my end for specific direction on how to act embarrassed. I've seen how good her work is and I trusted her instincts and skill in making the character Agent 34 come to life. She did not disappoint.

 

 

 

Without giving away too many spoilers, the film also called for some rope ;). Ariel has made some self-bondage videos and being that I was new, I let her know she was welcome to do the rope tie herself as it can require a lot of trust to have someone you might not know well tie you up. To my surprise and gratitude, she was okay letting me do the tie and I think I had the biggest starstruck/fan moment of my life as I did the tying. It was not a tie that was complex or high risk (there is lower risk and higher risk when it comes to rope but with rope there will always be some risk), but I felt so appreciative of her generosity in trusting me to tie her up for the shot we needed. What I like about kink, the skill in communicating boundaries and needs, exploring vulnerable states of emotion so we can come out feeling better about ourselves, and having fun, were all things I got to experience shooting with Ariel. We each made jokes throughout the whole shoot, shared our own mutual backgrounds and upbringings, and learned from each other. I felt like I gained so much wisdom from listening to Ariel talk about her experience in the industry and also just working with her as director to actor. I will hold this memory as one of the highlights of my life, not just professionally, but personally as well because I am so glad I got to share space with her. 

 

As I write this blog before uploading Embarrassment is Forever, I got an adrenaline rush listening to the public domain music play right before she stepped on screen for the introduction. There are some great embarrassed and exposed moments in here and so please check it out and watch Ariel's amazing work. If you are someone who pays for custom videos to be made, I can say without hesitation that hiring Ariel is worth your time and money.  Also be sure to follow her as she will be promoting her next book!

New things to come!

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All the Filthy Details Podcast and the power of a voice

 Let's not ignore the fact that this pandemic (which is still happening despite what some may believe) has been a significant traumatic event for many of us. One aspect as been the interpersonal impact it has had, forcing many in isolation out of concern for their safety and the safety of others. I remember grieving the fact that dating and emotional intimacy would be out of the question for quite some time. Yet, I continued to use online dating apps and was able to get creative. One way in which intimacy was built up was erotica. As soon as a connection had formed, we started to send flirty messages and naughty pics. I started to share my erotica and one day decided to record myself reading it. It was fun to do and it also helped us connect emotionally when we could not do so in person. What started as a fun way to make things sexy over the internet became a fun way to remain connected, selecting a story I thought this person would enjoy and conveying the emotions of the characters when I read.

Skip ahead to a few weeks ago when I was given the chance to be a featured author on the All The Filthy Details podcast. 

 

 

This podcast focuses on erotica authors and reviewing their work. They caution the listener to wear headphones because the stories they read are not safe for work. Wow they are not kidding! The first episode I listened to had my mind wandering in all sorts of fun ways. The sound production is amazing. The voice actors reading the stories do a fantastic job and the sound effects in the background create the perfect mood for each story. Whenever I want to get in the mood, I often read erotica myself but All The Filthy Details makes it easier by letting you lay back and just listen to steamy voices describing some naughty acts in detail.

What I also like about this podcast are the book reviews. They review three titles and discuss what they liked about each. The featured author is also given a chance to review the titles. I had a blast answering the questions on the podcast because the producers asked me about the embarrassed naked genre and how psychology can be useful in writing erotica. I also got to record myself reading a sample from Pelt, the first story in The Immodest Collection vol 3. 

So as we move towards the fall with some worry that a second lockdown might happen, I will first say take care of yourself and remember, nobody asked for this to happen. We are in uncharted territories, the science is never going to be definite. Things are always changing and that is unfair, frustrating, and scary. Second, if you're looking to find ways to develop intimate connections with someone new or someone you've been with for a while, have fun with reading them some erotica. If you are still not sold on the idea, then give All the Filthy Details a listen, I'm sure they'll change your mind.

The Immodest Collection: Stories of Exosure and Shame vol 3 is here!

 

Today is the day I'm excited to share with you the cover for the Immodest Collection: Stories of Exposure and Shame Volume 3!. It's been a long journey writing this while also defending my dissertation, but I'm delighted with these three brand SPANKing new enf stories. It will be released on 6/20 for the Summer Solstice. It's a season where many wear little clothing to keep cool but for the women in my stories, they end up losing more clothes than they intended. The stories in this volume took a particular focus on the kinky side, emphasizing play dynamics in addition to my favorite themes of embarrassment from being stripped naked. What do I mean by kinky side? Let's just say there more than one meaning when I say the stories are SPANKing new. To give you another tease, enjoy the summaries for each story below:

Shannon has a wild side, one she embodies when she wears her leopard print onesie. Her partner, Dani, takes her on a camping trip, letting her run free in the great outdoors. The catch: Dani gets to hunt Shannon, putting her dignity on the line when Dani threatens to remove her spots if she is caught.

University professor, Dr. Martin keeps her kinky lifestyle private. As a Domme, she rigorously protects the privacy of her subs. When a fame-hungry vlogger blackmails her, Dr. Martin must relinquish control. Submission sits poorly on her shoulders, so when she gains the upper hand, she wastes no time showing the vlogger the true meaning of humiliation.

Bri took up pole dancing on a whim, but stayed for the hot instructor, KC. A year later, she spends her free time fantasizing about what KC’s strong arms could do to her. But at Bri’s summer party, it’s her pet, Lana, who breaks the ice by revealing a kinky secret that leaves Bri feeling mortified in front of her guests and worst of all, her crush. 

 

Stick around for more teasers! Cover art by Dawné Dominique at DusktilDawn Designs. 

Black Friday Sale! Get both Immodest Collection Volumes 50% off!

Pick up each Immodest Collection for 50% off on Smashwords! Six #erotica stories incorporating force #stripping and #humiliation for the price of one!



For the Immodest Collection use the promo code: VS73E

https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/693640

For the Immodest Collection Volume 2 use the promo code: PL66A

https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/937233

National Erotic Humiliation Day 2019 - FEAR

The following blog was written with Brigit Delaney's #eroticjournalchallenge

https://brigitdelaney.com/2019/09/the-erotic-journal-challenge-october-fears-insecurities/#

FEAR, Insecurity, Anxiety, and Self-Doubt

For some of us, fear holds us back from experiencing life to its limits. For others, fear is a catalyst. Whatever its place in your life, consider how fear, insecurity, anxiety, and self-doubt affect your erotic/sexual existence, either as an individual, a lover, or a writer.

"Has fear been part of your kink?"

Up until this past year, I never thought fear was part of my kink. I always identified embarrassment as it relates to forced stripping my primary kink, assuming embarrassment was a separate emotion from fear. As I have thought more about what emotions my kink taps into, I realize fear has a very potent role in many aspects of my life.

I remember dating someone several years back who would become very anxious to public acts of embarrassment. When I say anxious, even watching someone else do something awkward would make her uncomfortable. She would need to look away or leave the room, just from watching someone else do something embarrassing.  Need an example? She mentioned being very anxious watching this: http://www.cc.com/video-clips/eot1dx/the-daily-show-with-jon-stewart-tori-amos

Embarrassment is the surface emotion, but what is so bad about embarrassment?

In my own clinical work, judgement is something I have become very attune to identify. Words like "should" "guilt," and "feel bad" are all tied to shame. Embarrassment, is on the lighter side of this spectrum. We become hypervigilent of the threat of embarrassment. So what is the big deal about being embarrassed? My kink, forced stripping, usually isn't a big deal for someone who is comfortable with their body, and for exhibitionists, it's exciting. It's not the exposure, it's not the fear of exposure, it's the shame. shame underlies fear. and with shame comes judgement towards the self. Any threat to our sense of self is scary, because it taps into our thoughts as to who we are. Fear - Embarrassment - Shame. With exposure, it's not being naked that might be embarrassing, it's exposing what we don't want others to see. We may be comfortable naked in the right light or when our bodies look a certain way, but if there's threat of being seen in an unfavorable way, then we run and hide.

I find humiliation and embarrassment sexy because underlying that is a sense of vulnerability. It strips the individual of their armor that they try to present to the world. It scares us to think that we will not be seen as we wish to be seen. I once spoke with a friend who had no shame in walking around naked in public. When I asked them to imagine walking in public with their pants around their ankles, they said they could never do that, because that would be embarrassing. For them, that image was not how the wanted others to see them. In my field of psychology, social justice is another important aspect of my training. We are challenged to confront our own biases over gender, ability, sexuality, and race. Bring up any of these topics at a dinner party and what do you hear?

"No talking about politics"

"Why does everything have to be about race?"

"let's talk about something else."

What do phrases like these do? They avoid. What's the emotion? Discomfort? Annoyance? Fear...fear of what? Fear of saying something wrong? Fear that something will be misunderstood? Fear of being seen as racist? Again, underlying this fear is embarrassment or shame as being seen as such. From my own personal experience, these are things I have thought, done, or said at one point in my life. I was afraid of saying something wrong, because an anti-racist stance was what mattered to me. To say something wrong would invoke embarrassment, shame, and anger towards myself. These are powerful emotions and why I like kink is because it allows us to tap into emotions we otherwise try to avoid. Enter my short story "Privilege"

Privilege was my attempt at exploring how race, accountability, and silence can be used as a form of embarrassment in the context of kink. I initially wanted to resist writing it and when I identified my own resistance, I knew that was a sign that I needed to write it. Having seen silence in many classrooms used to avoid confrontation over the topic of race, I could see how it is used to protect the ego, protect one from being challenged, to protect one's dignity, often times, White people's dignity. I love the word "dignity", because in a forced stripping context, the loss of dignity usually results in someone being naked and exposed. That's why i am delighted when I discover new ways to apply my kink, especially in contexts that might not seem sexy at all. In the case of "Privilege" it is the topic of critical race theory in the classroom.

As I write this blog I still have fear, because i know what type of reaction the topic of race invokes from people on the internet. But as I celebrate Erotic Humiliation Day, I am happy to share with you all a new story that is perhaps the most personal as it mixes my life experience and my professional work with my passion. When I think more about the fear - embarrassment dynamic, I see so many new doors and possibilities and I can't wait to see where this takes me next. 

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07ZCKQHL9

https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/987115

Happy Erotic Humiliation Day

The Suit - Immodest Collection volume 2 sample excerpt

I've been giving a lot of love to the second story of the Immodest Collection and you've all seen the cover which comes from the first story. But I have not given much attention to The Suit, which was my nod to superhero comics. Typically we're supposed to look up to the superhero and they are often written to be perfect, physically and interpersonally. We are not supposed to question their values or behavior because, they are the hero. This inflexible mental "armor" gave me a great idea for an embarrassed nude female story. Enjoy a brief excerpt from The Suit and then check out the Immodest Collection Volume 2: Stories of Exposure and Shame on Amazon and Smashwords. 

The crackled sound of radio static interrupts my sleep and causes me to slam my hand on my snooze button. Through one open eye, I see it’s not my alarm clock going off. It’s my police scanner.

"...all units, report to the Bank of the Nation off Michigan Avenue. Shots have been fired. Eye witness accounts say it’s the Engineer."

"Shit." I whip my sheets off and roll out of bed, slapping my face to wake up.

"Remember, the Engineer will be armed and is extremely dangerous, do not engage..."

I scramble to pack my suit, I don’t need to listen to the rest, I remember. It was at the Natural History Museum, the Engineer tried stealing the tomb to a 14th century warlord. He booby trapped the place with motion sensor-activated automatic rifles. The memory of the dumbstruck look on his face when he saw bullets bouncing off my suit makes me smile. That and remembering the cracking sound of his ribs when my gauntlet connected with his chest. His frail body flew back several feet and landed ass-first into a garbage can. The memory brings back the fuzzy sensation all the way down to my toes.

The Engineer escaped six months later. Prison guards reported hearing him rant about “that butch bitch who needed armor to compensate for her inferior strength.” The word “butch” makes me laugh because it’s so different from my actual appearance. I wear makeup in public, I go to the salon to straighten my long black hair, and I have a closet full of tube top dresses that I adore because of the way they hug my tiny frame. That’s why I love being Riot, because I can beat up a dangerous criminal like the Engineer and I can be feminine the day after. It’s a shame I can’t reveal that to him but he can hold onto his “butch fantasy” all he wants.

The Bank of the Nation covers half of a block in downtown Detroit. I know a few spots that are safe to park my van two blocks away behind an abandoned factory. I slip into the back of the van and change into the Riot suit. Once I put my helmet on I leap out of the van. My steel boots slam into the ground and I slowly make my way towards the bank, each step feels like a sledgehammer slamming into the pavement. The air is humid, I’m already sweating in my suit but it’s a price I’m willing to pay to feel nothing.

I take a shortcut through the alley and step onto the sidewalk. The sound of my steps draws attention from the crowd grouped behind the barricade. They hold their phones up for pictures. I wave before I see an officer in uniform run up to me.

"We were wondering if you'd show up. Riot-er Ms. Riot-Mrs?” He looks young. The lack of facial hair gives him a babyface, a cute babyface with freckles. His body on the other hand reminds me of a football player with his wide shoulders and tight forearms. My boots me so much he has to look up to maintain eye contact. I try not to smile too much.

"Riot is fine. Any hostages?" I ask in a graveled tone of voice by straining my throat.

Officer Babyface shakes his head, "They all came out with their hands on their heads. Said that the Engineer killed two guards. We think he’s in the vault. The captain told us all to stand by but I guess you don’t have to worry about any danger.” He stops to scratch his head as he examines my suit. “I sure wouldn’t want to be him. What is it made of?” 

His eyes are level with my chest and I clear my throat, “Why don’t you let the others know I’m coming?”

“Right. Sorry!” He touches the radio resting on his shoulder, "Dispatch, Riot has arrived. I'm sending her over."

I wait for confirmation before continuing towards the bank. A parade of squad cars surrounds the massive twenty story building. A detective runs up to me as I approach the steps. He stops when I hold my hand up. The armored fist is the size of his head. "I already know the situation. Just sit tight, I need to teach him a harder lesson this time."

"Be careful, we don't know what booby traps he's set up. We heard shots fired before the hostages ran out."

I can’t resist being corny in that moment. I slowly turn my head to reveal a smirk. “Bullets aren’t my problem.”

Approaching the glass doors, I pull my arm back before driving my right fist through them. Shards explode and scatter across the tile floor. I step inside and the glass crushes under my boots. My head turns slowly from left to right as I take in the sight of a deserted lobby.

"Okay Engineer. I have better shit to do than play around. Why don't you save us all some time and surrender?"

My hands clench tighter once I hear a speaker system come on. "I've been waiting for you again Riot." his monotone voice is so deep it makes the speakers give off feedback. "You're right. Let's get down to business, I'm waiting by the vault on the other side of the bank."

"Smart man. I’d advise you to have your hands up by the time I get there. I'd hate to have to smash your toys after you worked so hard on them.

I hear the speaker cut off and roll my eyes, he’s so damn serious. I walk past the teller desk and through the metal detectors.  My upbeat mood is soured when I pass through a doorway and see two security guards lying face down on the ground. I clench my jaw, slowing the pace of my walk as I round the corner and see a massive round steel door slightly open. A sliver of fluorescent light spills out.

My left forearm shields my face as I approach the door, using my right to grab the handle and pull it wide open. My pulse rises as I step into the vault shouting, "Hands up Engineer!"

The interior of the 500 square foot roomis lined with metal lockboxes. Standing in the center of it all, a White bald male in his 50s. The red in his beard has started to turn gray. He wears brown khakis and a green plaid button up. Thick bifocal glasses magnify the hate in his dark brown eyes.

"Ms. Riot." His graveled tone is devoid of any warmth in his greeting. "How’ve you been?"

"I guess I didn't hit you hard enough last time." I see a black remote in his hand. His thumb rests on a red button. "Drop the device and you get to keep your teeth."

His body shakes and I see a vein on his forehead. He holds both hands in the air as if to comply, then his thumb pushes the button. "Oops."

I hear a rumble from outside, followed by a humming sound encompassing the entire vault. My eyes shift to the floor, then the ceiling. I hear metal tapping and I hold my hands up to protect my face. It’s not gunfire, it’s the rattling of coins bouncing inside their metal lock boxes. I can’t move my legs, but I notice my feet sliding toward the wall. “Shit.”

I try to lower my arms, but they won’t budge. My breathing gets heavier as I square my hips, trying to put weight into my heels. My triceps and shoulders burn as I try resisting the force pulling me away.

"What's the matter Riot? Is my magnet too much for you?" the Engineer stands next to me with his hands held behind his back.

My head dips ever so slightly, and then I curse when my helmet rips off my head, the red tint replaced with the natural colors of the room. I hear the thud of my helmet sticking to the wall. My pony tail falls loose.

"Mmm, you're a pretty one." The Engineer leans closer. His smile reveals a row of yellow teeth. "What's your name?"

"Fuck you!" I swing my right arm at him, only to lose balance as my right gauntlet rips off my fingers. Before I can save it, the other gauntlet sails towards the wall. With my weapons gone, I stare at my trembling arms. Unlike the bulging shape of my gauntlets, they lack any muscle tone, looking like rubber pencils in comparison. 

I’m snapped out of my trance when a high pitched squeal echoes in the vault. I look down and see the bolts around my chestplate shaking loose. A lump in my throat forms as I try not to wince in front of my enemy. I look back and reach for the doorway. I’m able to grab onto the edge with both hands. Turning my body is a mistake as my feet lift off the ground. I scream, looking down to see metal bolts shoot across the room. The chest and back piece split apart and collide into the wall,

I feel a breeze against my midriff and I kick my legs. "Stop it!" I shout in my natural voice, too panicked to hold onto my bravado. The tank top I wear might as well be a bra with how small it is.

           "Sorry, the remote is fried. Forgot the magnet was going to ruin the hardware." The Engineer dangles the remote before dropping it. "I hope you wore something under there."